I have a little something to do at the bank and it’s pretty straightforward but it involves changing an account and making sure stuff goes through the proper account. I’ve had trouble before where they assured me everything was set to go through okay and it didn’t, so this is generating quite a bit of anxiety in me on top of a contractor coming this week and a visit from relatives.
When you’re in trouble, an oracle deck just won’t do, you need a tarot card. Am I right?
There she is, raising her sword and telling me not to lose my temper. If something goes wrong they can fix it, it’s not all up to me. One of the things I liked in James Ricklef’s books is the idea of not meting out punishment, not feeling like you need revenge. Losing my temper if something goes awry would wound everyone and carry on throughout my relationship with the institution. This bears remembering.
Cause and effect: take responsibility myself. I am well prepared, I just have to make sure my anger or fear does not overtake the meeting.
One of the reasons I like tarot is that you can pull a card like this and get a sensible look at life’s challenges, and thus prepare yourself to resolve them.
We’ve had a busy week with contractors and banks and my insomnia kicked in. Three to five hours of sleep leaves me dragging around, so this week I got into the digital jigsaw program Jigsaws Galore, which was a Windows program that is now available for the Mac. I find it soothing and I can load in my own pictures to make puzzles. I used some of my own card images or montages and a couple from the Internet and just had fun.
This is the Soulflower Plant Spirit Oracle by Lisa Estabrook which I don’t have but might one day purchase. I love botanical decks in particular, but I was disappointed with a few decks I bought this year so I like to think carefully about buying any new decks.
Then I had to scan in and enter my copy of the Pagan Otherworlds Tarot in my database, so I decided to use my samples of the cards and card back as a jigsaw.
Then I took an old image of bower birds that I used on this blog comparing the Animal Totem Tarot and the Linestrider Tarot cards that feature bower birds. That Linestrider card has lots of white which was challenging to piece together. I think I did about 480 pieces for this. With this bigger screen I can do more pieces than I could on a small 15-inch laptop.
I found a nice image of the Ancient Italian Tarot online and did a jigsaw of that, but I didn’t take a screen shot.
While doing these I opened up iTunes and listened to some of my collections of music. Jigsaws are compelling, so naturally Cassandra Wilson’s rendition of the old standard You Go To My Head was perfect.
As I contemplated buying decks and playing cards, Brad Mehldau’s Hungry Ghost song played on as well as Paul McCartney’s song Appreciate.
That Soulflower card deck sure is pretty though….
IX THE HERMIT
II DEWI SARASWATI – WISDOM (The High Priestess)
In the Tarot Wayang, Saraswati is associated with the Moon and changes, replacement, addition, subtraction and “inconstantly” which seem like words associated with the Moon and the intuitive qualities of The High Priestess.
The Hermit looks a tad unbalanced as if his feet were hurting or perhaps frozen and inflexible for walking. If you can see ahead of you, with lamp light or the light of the Moon, but your feet aren’t working, perhaps it’s a good day to rest? Or maybe your feet hurt but you carry on following where the light leads?
The wisdom to know: addition, subtraction black or white, things are either this or that, but really it’s all the same. The moon is the moon whether it’s going through a phase where you see a quarter of it or the full moon. “Every extreme carries its opposite embedded in it” says James Ricklef.
I like that idea, as if within joy you carry sadness, within depression you carry the ability to be energized and work and be happy. The Hermit goes within and it’s not loneliness it’s solitude, which also carries expansiveness. I think that’s the idea today, that duality is only a feeling and the whole thing is with you all the time.
Accessible should you listen.
PAGE OF WANDS
K’OUEN – L’AFFLICTION – I Ching 47 – Exhausting (Huang translation)
SHADOW – I face my shadow-self bravely
This Page is so young, so bursting with enthusiasm. James Ricklef refers to this enthusiasm as living life like a dog in a car. That tail wagging, ready-to-go, hanging your head out the window to see what’s coming up kind of feeling.
Which is not something I’ve felt for a while since being undermined by health problems, but the Yi King card (which is in French) refers to solitude and patience as a way out of affliction. When you are exhausted sometimes the best thing is to do nothing, to be patient.
The card from The Healing Deck mentions anxiety and self-doubt that poisons relationships and weakens our resolve, hardly things this Page would feel or think. Allow your light side to triumph, but allow time, bide your time, be patient. Reflection, interior solitude, let the faiblesse, the weakness and dimness pass.
This Page wears a mask, cut from a lion apparently whose dead legs hang down from his costume. Perhaps a way of feeling good is to put on the mask and act as if you felt well, as if you were strong, and then wait in your solitude for your light side to triumph.
KING OF PENTACLES
GRAPE (PUTAO) – Vitis vinifera
The King is trying to hide those brambly prickles under soft, malleable leaves. Reaching out a hand he pretends to generosity and a pleasant demeanour, when we really see him as he is in this Chinese mirror. The back of it is fruitful with abundant grapes and the frolicking of birds and animals, but turn it over and see the King reflected in all his parsimonious glory, wrapped in dried up grapevines.
Disregarding his downcast eyes, I ordered a book on watercolour and the Kindle version of James Ricklef’s book on tarot spreads.
Go wrap yourself with wet reeds from the stagnant pond King. You might well look down and clutch your big pentacle and try to camouflage your dark face with a beautiful animal.
VII THE CHARIOT
31 – The Rubaiyat
Up from Earth’s Centre through the Seventh Gate
I rose, and on the Throne of Saturn sate,
And many Knots unravel’d by the Road;
But not the Knot of Human Death and Fate
I assume this is Apollo or Helios with the sun on his headdress, riding the Chariot of the sun using rams instead of horses because the horses were getting their manes braided this particular morning. If so, there is an interesting bit of history that in the ancient world, Saturn was once referred to as The First Sun, thus tying in to the card from The Mystic Rubaiyat.
If not, then perhaps Apollo commandeered a chariot to rise up and ride Saturn and maybe have a chat about logical positivism with the dead. As you do.