Archive for the ‘Tarot – General’ category

New Tarot Cupboards

March 28, 2017

I’m into my tenth day of trying to organize my bedroom. I have one tiny half rack I’m using for clothes in the walk-in closet, and the rest is all craft, art supplies and doll or dollhouse stuff. Yeah, I’ve got MY priorities straight.

These are flat-pack pantries or wardrobes. These are fairly light and hold a lot with the extra wire racks I put on the shelves. I had one extra shelf cut for each cupboard and still they are filled up.


Now I have to organize and put away the mess at the end of my bed. I have ordered a nice wooden blanket box in a “chocolate cherry” stain but that won’t be here for weeks. My quilts are reeking of plastic after being stored for 2 years or so in a Rubbermaid plastic bin. Never again. I’ve washed the ones I can, but the quilt tops can’t be washed so I’ll try to air them out in other ways.

I can actually get to my decks now and I found I had room to display my tarot bags facing toward the front—so pretty. I JUST had room for all the boxes too. While reorganizing the decks, I got rid of two so I’m still under 400 at 399 decks. I couldn’t fit my postcard collection in the cupboards, so they’ve gone into the closet for now. I wondered while looking at some of these decks why I bought them but I think the Internet has a lot to do with fuelling the purchase of stuff.

My next task is to enter my four new decks in my database. I received the 72 Names of God deck by Orna Ben-Shoshan yesterday and I really love it, it has such depth in information and artwork.

You Always Have Your Cat

March 3, 2017

Yesterday I was up during the night so I slept in about an hour later than the spouse. When I got up the house was about 15-16° C and I was cold and in pain and I asked him why he hadn’t turned the heat on and he said he wasn’t in the other room, he was in the family room with the woodstove going. Oh gee, now as well as not turning the heat on we are relegated to living in one room.

I got upset. I am very careful with the electric heat and only turn it on when necessary. I save hydro by not using the dryer, I turn lights out, I conserve heat, but I want some comfort when I’m at home too, you know? This was way too far, almost irrational. My neighbours spend $400 per month in the winter to heat their house. I spent $93 last month during the worst of winter, and I had the heat on in my living room during those months so I know it’s been fine.

It made me feel worthless, like I’m a welfare case who can’t afford to heat the house. I finally fled back to my bedroom for a nap and turned the heat on up there and I was nice and cozy. I could hardly speak to him I felt so hurt.

I pulled two cards today to ask about this:



Latex is very talented and successful and her work is appreciated by all. Poor old Joshua has had his heart broken and can’t seem to get beyond it. His cats are comforting him. Don’t suffer in silence Josh, talk about it.

Well, I took my cue from Joshua and explained to the spouse why I like the heating on and how it made me feel yesterday when he refused to turn it on. I wonder with Latex if I simply did not feel appreciated and honoured by having the comfort of some heat in the house after I’d worked hard to conserve hydro and keep our bills down for months?

I think so. And remember, you always have your cat, no matter how poorly the parsimonious fink you live with behaves.

Another thing about Latex, she knows her destiny and takes care of herself, she chooses to be successful. Joshua could learn from that to speak up for himself, talk that out before it turns to resentment.

Today was a better day. Josh took the cats to the grocery store and bought them some broccoli. They were ecstatic!

That Chipper Bower Bird

January 26, 2017

This Seven of Pentacles is one of my favourite cards from the Linestrider Tarot.



I was thinking about my sketchbook and how I haven’t been working in it although I have a terrific idea I want to execute, so I drew these two cards in a query about what I should do.

The Seven is about hard work and waiting for fruition. It reminds me of something I saw in a book by Andrew Matthews about waiting for water to boil and thinking that nothing is going on when in actual fact there is, and in an instant the water starts bubbling and boiling even though you were watching it and it was not moving at all. It’s a long-term thing, it doesn’t happen overnight.

Then I see the Five card as a complication of injury, a loss of belief in myself and confidence, and maybe yet another nod to future ill health if I don’t do something now. Maybe all the physical stuff is coming to an end and I can work hard again?

I think when I am in pain I do get disheartened and certainly lose confidence, but the cheery bower bird plugs away, chipping away, adding just the right flowers and decoration.

Ennui and the 4 of Cups Across Decks

January 25, 2017

What to do when you feel…nothing? Examine the 4 of Cups in several decks, get a good look at it, eat an apple, wait for something to happen, try to muster up enthusiasm for the sixteen projects you have on-the-go, eat a strawberry, eat homemade potato and leek soup, look through a bunch of old art magazines that you bought ten years ago.

Wait. Slump in the chair, look out the window at cats passing by, go to the library, hang with insomnia for a bit, clench your teeth, read about the 14th century, read about old varieties of roses, vacuum out the fan on your laptop, clean the kitty litter, look at the wall, wonder if the guardian angel appears in the mirror of your dresser or leaps from behind the bathroom door, exiting with a graceful dance after bouncing in to perform various miracles for you.

Wait some more, do laundry and hang the clothes on the rack in the front hall, where you haven’t painted the beige wall a grey colour with a white tree yet, eat a slice of mango and contemplate re-heating jasmine tea in the microwave, sigh and look out at the little girl in the pink coat walking her dog as she skips by going downhill in front of your house and laughs.

Well, you get the drift, hence the 4 of Cups. There is a scent of self-flagellation or self-indulgence with this card. Be wary travellers in self-pity!

I have a large collection so only pulled a few decks at random. Strangely, this has rather cheered me up. Nothing like a good ramble through cards to perk me up. My favourite card (at least this time) was the one from the Infinite Tarot, a deck I don’t see used much but I like the artwork.


Natural forces have you trapped. Oh yeah, I knew it couldn’t be me (cough). Mention here is made of being fearful of death, poor diet, malnourishment, and a lot of negative self-talk. Your own thinking encourages this downfall. Improper choices in thought and deed—look there for rescue.


Here we all are turning away, closing our eyes, with our sad sack mouths, oblivious to that nice kestrel offering us a possibility. Sometimes it’s good to turn away, get a bit of rest, cure your weariness of life with a quiet spell, but not drunkenness. The danger is in never coming back to life and all the good, positive things in life.


The Experimental Tarot has a woman contemplating her ecstatic vision of life. The problem is she’s trapped in a moat. That big hand might be holding her up or holding her in place. Another dreamer with her eyes closed, drifting into a permanent state of bliss while missing the action of life. The German word graben on the card means past or to dig, dig in the past. We get our English expression “grub in the earth” from this word. Put your head in a hole in the earth, don’t ever look at what’s happening now. Oh, she’s in ecstasy, but the things she’s contemplating aren’t real. She’s floating in a moat, permanently wet, come back to reality missy.

In the Scapini deck it’s like all the visions are held in urns, unable to get out and she won’t play, won’t ride her dragon. Eyes covered again, we mustn’t look at the good things, the possibilities. Sad faces everyone.


Don’t you just love the grey and taupe tones she’s used in the Linestrider? It captures the feeling and her eyes are closed, her head is wrapped in a scarf, and she has a large fish on her chest. The fishy emotions have obscured her breasts, the bubbles coming from the fish pop and the sounds “Sad sack, wet blanket” envelop her.

The Aquarian picture is similar to the Fradella in the first group, the hand of God offers life and a big cup but he/she won’t look. The lady in the Heart Tarot is reading a letter, perhaps the final letter from a long-ago sweetheart, dreaming of joy and love, she sits slumped at the table barely holding her head up. The hermit crab in the Animal Wisdom contemplates the glory and protection of shells.

Wet blankets and sad sacks, steeped in wine, misery, and about to go over the falls, there must be better choices. Swim to shore, dry off and get out your pencils and draw a cartouche! Of course, the exact cure for sad sacks, drawing cartouches. Add a lizard, add a condor, get the wet sack off the condor and go. Start in small steps to drag yourself to shore, concentrating on the thorn-tailed rayadito in the tree. What do you mean you don’t see it, it’s bright yellow and black, it’s right there?

Open your eyes.


Catalogue Consciousness in The World

November 15, 2016

In September I received a catalogue in the mail from the Maplelea doll company, forwarded from my old address. I had asked to be removed from their mailing list three years ago after being treated rudely by two of their staff when suggesting they offer sewing patterns for their dolls. It brought up some anger in me, and this marketing ploy of resurrecting old customers bothered me. I put it in the recycle bin and forgot about it.

Another catalogue rolled in several weeks later, and this time I browsed through it several times and then started making a list of things to buy. Shoes are $12 to $18 a pair, outfits are $26 to $50 each and with $9 shipping I couldn’t seem to buy anything for a reasonable amount of money. I let it sit for four days, thinking all the time how happy I had been not buying anything from them, and how I didn’t really want anything. Then I woke up, put the catalogue in the recycle bin and sent them an e-mail asking to be taken off their mailing list yet again.

This morning I scrounged for a book and picked up Hooked!: Buddhist Writings on Greed, Desire, and the Urge to Consume, and there was a relevant passage staring at me. It is from the first chapter and Joseph Goldstein says:

“Covetousness, the wanting mind, the feeling that we never have enough, is seen in Buddhism as unskillful action of the mind. In the framework of the Buddhist cosmology and the different realms of existence, this covetous mind state is most extreme in the hungry-ghost realm. Hungry ghosts are often depicted as having huge stomachs and pinhole mouths, showing how they are incapable of ever feeling satisfied. In our culture, we might call it ‘catalog consciousness,’ obsessively rifling through the pages to see what else we might want. This is ‘wanting to want,’ a disease our culture keeps nourishing. [Emphasis mine.]

Gaki zōshi (section of the Scroll of Hungry Ghosts) 12th century: You can see the ghosts preying on humans, hanging around, with their mouths constantly wanting, and distended bellies. The one on the left seems to be the particular one that plagues me.


I thought I’d draw cards from a deck to augment this awareness. I randomly plucked the Golden Tarot of the Tsar from a shelf and drew these two cards:



The four evangelists read and write, doing their work and study, feeding the world of cosmic ultramarine, safely bordered in gold. And Jesus in the Ace of Swords, surrounded by four corners, puts out his boundless arms and says “Reach for a better life, you have all you need.” Resolve the old problems, think differently.

The World gives you understanding of what’s important, so free yourself from restrictions, complete things, start others but apply yourself and become closer to who you really are, create your reality. You can consume the World endlessly or feed it.

I mention again one of my favourite songs, Hungry Ghost by Brad Mehldau and Mark Guiliana which you can see here.

Feel the gnawing, then contemplate The World.

The Insanity of the Visual Imperative

November 12, 2016

Crazy Card Lady Story #59

I was reading before bed last night and when my eyes got tired I pulled out the Wisdom for Healing Cards which I haven’t seen for a while to browse through. “Oh, this card reminds me of another card” said I in card comparison mode. This often happens to me, and I can generally put my hand to the card I’m thinking of, but last night memory was a bit swirly-misty.

Three hours later and about 18 decks (which isn’t bad actually) I had sort of remembered a girl with red hair and a white dress in a doorway. Knowing the style of the painting I pulled out Kay Steventon’s Celestial Tarot which didn’t have the card but I knew it was in her other deck, one of the first decks I bought, and then I couldn’t remember the name. By this time it was 2 a.m. and I had to go down to the computer and look it up. Back upstairs I was puzzling over where I had put the Spiral Tarot, when I remembered vaguely sticking it in one of my handmade tarot bags. I had swapped out the Zerner Farber deck in the first bag I made myself and put the Spiral in there. By this time it was 3 a.m. and I thought I’d better go to bed and scan and discuss the two cards in the morning.

I needed a fresh, alert mind for this vital discussion.



Am I ever going to change? Is the imperative to find cards in the dark while everyone else is sleeping going to change? Not a bit. One has skills you see, visual skills and memory that need honing now and then.

Girls in dresses at doorways to the sky and garden; they exist, my brain wants to find them. Change and moving on, these cards go well together. The change is that I now consider this perfectly normal to hunt for cards for three hours at night, a joyous, peaceful kind of thing, swathed in the mystery of night and stars, cozy in my eyrie, sifting through numerous card decks and thinking “Wow, the art on this is so good!”

It sure is.

Stasis or Respite?

September 18, 2016

What I like about The Lost Code of Tarot is that you simply can’t mistake it for any other deck, it is so recognizable.



We go up, we go down, we mirror, we balance. Is this stasis or respite?

Apart from a couple of small things, our exterior renovation is complete. They came yesterday and fixed some things and cleaned up the yard and driveway which were untidy and littered with detritus. It looks a heck of a lot better, and hopefully will be finished up next week.

Being Sunday, I am incredibly happy that no one is coming, it’s a day of quiet and rest. My oldest sister is doing some renovation in her house and mentioned how it was guaranteed to cause divorce and I said “Ask me if I know!” A couple of weeks is fine, but we are inching into our 7th week and we’ve both had enough.

We now need to move our compost heap and repair the fencing at one side. Our neighbour is on board to help and we will share the work and cost, so that should also neaten things up. We are still missing front porch stairs so are waiting for the carpenter to come and do that.

Still not finished, but today is rest day and involves not limitations but rest. Cup of jasmine tea?

Happy Sunday!