Liquid Portals, Flowing

I unpacked 3 blue plastic bins and half of a large carton of fabric yesterday. It’s everywhere along with bits and pieces of boxes and crafts. I don’t know how I’m going to put it all away.

While unpacking one box I came across a large version of a card from the Portal Tarot. This was my favourite card from the deck and I can’t quite remember but I think Traci Darin make me a copy as a treat, just because it was my favourite.



Blending and balancing. Strangely, the teals and reds are the accent colours in my new living room; no wonder I love this card. Because of a dream I had early yesterday morning I thought of passages of life with this and how you stream along in life, and the portals you go through shrink in size as you leave them behind. Balance but also perspective, distance. The current you now flow in is larger, the massive portal surrounds you and there you are, going through.

I always get good things from this deck. At some point Traci and David had started working on the minor cards to create a full tarot deck but life interfered, they changed, they flowed through a different portal. I remember free-falling with imagination when I saw a sample of one of the minor cards, and feel regret, feel that missed fruition for the deck in its entirety.

Back to currents: given the current way of funding decks for independent publishers, I wish 14 years hadn’t passed, I wish they could get back to the Portal. I find it interesting when musicians revisit music they have played. I remember Glenn Gould’s two renditions of Bach’s Goldberg Variations, and I’ve always thought the one he did when older was better, more sensitive, nuanced. Authors and musicians can have a second crack at it sometimes.

After my dream, I was happy to see the portal of the past recede, to find it was gone, replaced by a larger circumstance of life. It is a good thing to move rather than stagnate, however I find myself thinking of the way you can reach into the past and pick the best things and revisit them. I still remember years ago reading that menopause was “reverse puberty” and I thought of the important things I left behind, like art and writing, and I plucked them back to me from the past. Like the co-mingling of spirit and flesh that Traci refers to in her notes for this card.




4 thoughts on “Liquid Portals, Flowing

  1. “Menopause is reverse puberty” – now that would explain a lot. 😀
    What a thought-provoking post. I’ve lost and left behind a lot of things as I’ve moved through portals. Some I’m glad to have let go of and some I miss; I might have to try reaching back through and pulling out some of those that provided me with that easy feeling of joy.

    • I found myself missing things too. All that hurly-burly of jobs, raising children for some, falling in love, it pushes your essence aside.

      But part of ageing is assessment, when you can more clearly see what’s important, and pull back some of that essence.

      The famous passage from Corinthians comes to mind: ” When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”

      Who is to say what is a childish thing and what is the essential essence of a person?

    • Yes, I agree about Joni. I just thought of another one: Billy Joel’s “Vienna”–his original doesn’t have the same feel as the live version he did when he was much older.

      There is a poignancy there of loss that they didn’t quite capture in their youth.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s