I had a meltdown last night, worrying about moving and “staging” the house for sale and not having room to put things away, and having to take art down off the walls. The trouble is that I have nowhere to store paintings safely and I know the glass would get broken and I’m weary of things getting wrecked. I will take small things down that I can wrap and keep safe before we paint the rooms. Edit it somewhat, but only small things that I can store without breaking them.
Still, it bugs me, all this staging stuff you have to do today. You want things to look nice and get a good sale price but everybody wants perfection. I already have trouble sleeping and this worry exacerbates it.
Don’t ponder others.
That leaf in the middle is starting to feel surrounded and bound on all sides. All these other plants saying “Your leaves should be like mine!” Other people do tend to get preoccupied with helping you fix or change things. They get caught up in comparing, assuming, analyzing, and living your life instead of their own. It’s distracting to them, it’s about making them feel okay, not you.
I got two calls in the last two weeks from someone I refer to as The Cat Lady. Neither one of us will answer the phone and speak to her. This is not a friend, this is someone who latched onto me and has never really made an effort to know me or to listen to me after 28 years. She hasn’t been in my house for 15 years, and yet she phones and phones sounding bitter and resentful when I do pick up the phone. I can no longer take it.
This card is about minding your own business. We have enough trouble knowing our own hearts and minds, so how can we know about others? Norman Fischer calls this “Don’t figure others out.” What a relief just to say it. (Judy Lief says the same thing, so that’s a innate part of this slogan, we all feel the relief.)
Part of not figuring people out is to leave them alone, don’t ponder them. It works both ways. Trust your own experience and don’t compare yourself, don’t highlight the flaws of others and ignore your own.